Office Space

I am assuming, and hoping, that everyone has seen the brilliant and realistic movie Office Space. Well, today I am living in that world. Today I am both Milton and Peter.

First, I am Milton because of the birthday cake AND the stapler. Today was somebody's birthday. As they were passing out cake, I was thinking, "don't forget me in the lobby, don't forget me in the lobby." And then, after having a bad few hours this morning (before the cake), I thought, I am Milton, but Milton threatened to set the building on FIRE. Milton was in a movie and I am NOT, so I can't set the building on fire... And then, someone asked to borrow my Swingline stapler. I was alarmed at how protective I felt of my stapler. As soon as I realized that I was Milton, I gladly handed over the stapler and repeated to myself, "this is not my real life forever. I am NOT a secretary forever." So of course I checked my calender again for the 12th time today and saw that I have 2 months and 6 days. I digress.

And I said, I don't care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I'm, I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And, and I told Don, too, because they've moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn't bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it's not okay because if they take my stapler then I'll set the building on fire...

Secondly, I am Peter Gibbons because I see what everyone else does not in the fact that this place of business is ridiculous. BUT I won't go on about it... 2 months. 6 days. Praise. The. Lord.

Anyway. I am going to class now but I will post about the weekend and how wonderful it was tomorrow.